It is impossible to enjoy all of the mouth-watering food at Christmas time and not gain weight. I gained three of the 10 pounds I recently lost, and as I sit here at my computer, I can’t help think of the remaining Ferrero Rocher candies sitting on top of my dresser in my bedroom.

I guess I should eat them near my son more often. I opened my package of candies the day after Christmas, ad all of my children immediately started clamoring for one. I ignored them as I unwrapped the nutty chocolat-y goodness.

I had just unwrapped the candy and held the unwrapped nugget out to pop into my mouth when my 8-year-old son grabbed it out of my hand and popped it into his mouth. His claim was that he just couldn’t sit next to someone about to eat the candy of the gods without trying it.  He gets this from the latest ad, which notes that “since the beginning of time, the gods have indulged themselves…. until one day that secret escaped from their hands to be discovered by man.” The commercial urges you to share the secret of gold.

I have two more Christmas parties to get through before the new year, and I am going to have to be diligent in moderating what I eat and upping my exercise to make up the difference. It will be easier when this “secret of gold” is no longer in my home.

Yesterday, I showed up at the hospital to have my blood drawn. The blood work will check to make sure there isn’t a medical reason for my inability to lose weight and my tendency to gain weight.

My doctor wants to make sure it doesn’t have anything to do with my thyroid, but I suspect that there isn’t any medical reason interfering.

Giving blood involved fasting after midnight, which meant I had to find a day that it would be convenient for me to both fast after midnight AND leave my house early in the morning to get blood drawn. Yesterday was that day, and I really missed my morning coffee. After the blood draw, the first place I stopped was to buy coffee.

The actual process of getting blood went pretty quickly, but there were unexpected problems.

It has been a while since I’ve had blood drawn. I have a tendency to have iron-low blood, so I no longer donate blood on a regular basis. And in the last couple of years, I haven’t done a lot of self-health maintenance. Still, I wasn’t anticipating any problems.

I have good veins. I know this because I’ve frequently been told this by nurses who have no problem drawing my blood.

Or perhaps that statement should be past tense.

I had good veins.

Yesterday, I had veins that were not cooperating.

The nurse tried my left arm, which is where my blood is usually drawn. No dice. After a few finger flicks to encourage my reclusive veins, she switched arms. She had me make a fist, and I could feel my fingernails digging into the palms of my hands as I tried to will my veins to cooperate.

The tourniquet the nurse put on my arm to make my veins appear was uncomfortable from the moment the nurse placed it on my arm. I didn’t say anything about the rubber digging into my arm, and I probably should have since I realize now something wasn’t right.

She finally managed to get a needle into a vein, and filled up two or three vials. The vials filled slowly, so I don’t think the needle was in the vein very well. I even wondered why my blood flow was so weak, but the nurse didn’t say anything.

I considered asking if the nurse had any theories about why my veins were hiding today, but I didn’t know how to say, “are my arms too fat?” I wonder if it is harder to find a vein in overweight people. I suspect it might be so, but I don’t know since I couldn’t bring myself to ask.

When she was done, it hurt, but I was happy it was over so quickly. Within an hour I had a tiny bruise on the inside of my right elbow.

This morning, the tiny bruise has grown so large that a silver dollar wouldn’t cover it up. It’s more than an inch-and-a-half in width and height. The sorest spot is right where my elbow bends making it create a dull ache all the time.

It’s no wonder people don’t like needles.

I have avoided talking about the numbers that make up my weight. I dance around the numbers, and I try to avoid actually saying what they are. Instead I focus on the weight loss, or my goal weight.

I need to stop doing that, and I started that process in my last blog by admitting my weight. I wanted to compile a history of my weight, or at least as close as I could.

Before I compile my weight numbers, I want to mention my height is 5 foot, 7 inches and some change. Most people misjudge my weight by about 30 pounds lower than my actual weight. Most recently, I had someone guess I weighed almost 60 pounds less than what I actually weigh. Height can be a blessing.

My ideal height-weight combination varies depending on what you use to determine it. The Hamwi Formula indicates a woman should weigh 100 pounds for the first five feet, and an additional six pounds for every inch over five feet. I am 5 feet seven inches, so that means I can weight 100 + (7 X 6) = 142. This seems like a very low weight, almost too low for me.

The Metropolitan Life Insurance Company has a weight-height chart based on three possible frame sizes. It even offers suggestions on how to figure out your frame size. My elbow size is pretty close to 3 inches, which places me in the large frame category, which really isn’t a surprise to me. Based on my frame size, my ideal height-weight range is 143 to 163. My overall goal for a healthy lifestyle is to be around 160, but I wouldn’t be unhappy to be in the 170 range.

In August 2007 , I had talked to my doctor hoping I could get some advice that would help. She wasn’t concerned with my weight. It wouldn’t have been mentioned at all if I hadn’t brought it up. I found it surprising that my doctor wouldn’t comment despite me being at least 80 pounds overweight. When I asked, she recommended Weight Watchers and gave me a menu for a 1200 and/or 1400 calorie diet. She suggested 1,000 calories was too low. And that’s it. She didn’t have any other suggestions.

One of my goals in losing weight is to also learn more about establishing a healthy lifestyle. I realize I have skewed ideas of acceptable portion sizes, and I am trying to adjust my ideas. I think this type of change is required in order for me to maintain any weight loss I achieve. I also think I can’t do it by myself, yet I don’t want to rely on artificial means in figuring out what to eat either. Weight Watchers uses points, and I can add up the points, but what do I do when points information is unavailable? How does this help me with non Weight Watcher meals? I don’t want the Cliff Notes version of weight-loss information. All of this led eventually to me seeking out a new doctor who would spend some time teaching me life-long changes that I can use to not just lose weight but to maintain a healthy weight.

Another way to figure your weight is to determine your body-mass index. It is also based on your height and weight, and it places you smack dab into various categories ranging from underweight to morbidly obese. In September, I researched the possibility of weight-loss surgery. I was close to 100 pounds overweight, and I was looking at various possibilities because I was feeling very discouraged.

In September, I learned my BMI was 38. In order to qualify for weight-loss surgery, you are supposed to have a BMI of 40 or above. If you have a BMI of 38, you can still have the surgery if you have other health factors. In order to have a BMI of 40, I would weigh 255 pounds (39.9). It was sobering to realize I was within15 pounds of being morbidly obese.

Last week, my BMI was 36.8.

At 170 pounds, my BMI would be 26.6, which is still considered overweight. To be within a healthy range, your BMI needs to be 18.5 to 24.9. At 5.7, I would need to weight 159 pounds to have a BMI of 24.9. At the low end of the BMI range, 18.5, I would need to weigh 118, which is supposedly still in the normal range. It sounds positively skeletal to me, especially at my height. Is it really skeletal or has our society’s views of “healthy” been skewed to the far end of the range? I don’t know about society, but I do know my view is skewed, which is what I am trying to change. I’m going to keep my goal at the upper end of the range and shoot for 160.

Keep in mind that is a long-term goal. At this very moment, I would be very happy if I could get under 200.

And now, here is my weight in history:

1971 – August – 8 pounds, 7 ounces (I couldn’t resist since it really is the LEAST I’ve ever weighed);

1971 – November – I was 3 months old, and my mom wrote in my baby book that the doctor had switched my formula because I was gaining too much weight;

1972 to 1989 – I have no idea what I weighed since I didn’t really pay attention. Weight wasn’t an issue for me. I wasn’t skinny, but I wasn’t fat;

1989 – high school – 150 pounds; I remember I had a 24-inch waist at the time;

1994 – pregnant with my first child – 200 at 10 months pregnant (she was overdue);

And thus began my weight loss roller coaster.

1995 I was pregnant (February through October);

1996-97 I was pregnant October through June);

1998 I was pregnant March through January 1999;

With each pregnancy my weight went up further and further beyond that 200 mark that at one time I thought I would never pass. I have blocked my memory for what I actually weighed during my various pregnancies, but I believe I would gain about 70 pounds each time, and I think my highest weight was in the 260 range while pregnant and due any day. I did lose my baby fat after my youngest was born;

1999 – August I weighed about 185; After the pregnancy and my weight loss, my lunch typically consisted of a Coke and a can of mixed nuts. I had no idea about portion sizes. For the record, one cup of salted mix nuts has 886 calories and 728 of them are from fat. Back then, I thought nuts were a healthy snack choice.

2000 – Holding steady around 180 range;

2002 – I went up to the high end of 180;

2003 – summer – I remember my dad commenting on my weight, noting a recent weight loss, I was back to around 180/high 170s;

2003 – Thanksgiving – my dad died four days before the holiday, and I swore I would do something about my excess weight; I was 20 pounds overweight; I didn’t want to have the health issues he had struggled with throughout my life;

2003 – November – I started working for a newspaper and worked long hours, sometimes as many as 12 to 14 in a single day. I would bring a grocery bag with my lunch and dinner, and my weight went up;

2005 – 190 range – I gave up pop this year, and I drank less than five pops all year long; My alcohol intake probably increased this year. I rarely drank before this, but this year I began drinking more in social situations.

2006 – January – I began attending grad school while working a full-time job at the newspaper and a part-time job at the college; Several times a week in 2006 I would eat at fast food places as I commuted from one place to another. I tended to drive approximately 700 miles a week; Some days I would eat both lunch and dinner behind the wheel of my car after I purchased it from a fast food restaurant. I was drinking pop again too.

2006 – March – I weighed 219; I began exercising, primarily walking, but it was difficult to maintain with my schedule.

2006 – March – one week later – I weighed 233;

2006 – Fall – 240 range

2006 – December for about two weeks – 250 pounds

2007 – February – 240

2007 – March – 235

2007 – April to November – weight frequently fluctuates by about 5 pounds, but it does not drop below 235; at times it does reach 240, but I have not let myself go back above 240.

2007 – December – Weight drops to 235 at doctor’s office and 232 on bathroom scale; lowest weight since March 2006.

The things I am willing to post on the Internet so strangers (and friends and family) can read astounds me. Rest assured that the numbers on my scale are as close as I am going to get to TMI (too much information).

It has been four years since I started gaining weight. It has been over two years since I’ve tried to lose weight. This year, I had the most success, logging in 15 pounds of weight loss since the first of the year. This is great! But most of that loss took place within the first three months of the year. Since that time, I have been fluctuating back and forth among the same ten pounds.

When I began in January in earnest, I did the math. I imagined myself losing at least two pounds a week in 2007. I asked a friend who had lost weight if this was reasonable. She told me to shoot for one pound a week. I readjusted my goal, and it seemed reasonable.

After the first 15, I lost 7 more and then I gained 8 lost 6 gained 4 lost 8 gained 6 lost 2 gained 9 lost 4…

You get the idea.

I began 2007 at an all time high (not counting pregnancy) of 250 pounds. I would estimate that I gained 40 to 60 of those pounds in 2006. In fact, I know for a fact that I weighed 219 in March 2006, which at the time I thought was horrible. Now I wish I weighed that.

I have not been able to get under 230 no matter what I’ve done. I have cut out pop and fast food. I have tried to eat sensibly. I am eating breakfast.

My downfalls that I was aware of but not willing to change (yet): flavored creamer in my coffee (fat free) and alcohol in social situations. (Last weekend I had three seven and sevens. Normally, I may have a few bud lights or Mike’s hard lemonade during a weekend.)

I have become frustrated and annoyed with myself. I don’t tend to snack, and I don’t normally eat after dinner.

Finally, I figured out that I had done all of the research I could online, and I needed active help from a medical professional. I made an appointment, and I went Wednesday.

I saw a nurse practitioner. I loved her. She probably spent 40 minutes or more talking to me about my habits and giving me great tips to help me continue to lose.

She ordered blood work, so she can rule out physical problems like thyroids. And she gave me some great tips.

I realized that I eat at the wrong time of the day. Typically, I don’t eat lunch until 2 or 3 p.m. I have dinner around 7 or 8 p.m. She suggested eating all of my food by the day no later than a 6 p.m. dinner. She said it will better match my metabolism, and it could result in additional weight loss. I’m trying it, along with some other things, and I hope it will result in some success.

Wednesday, at the doctor’s office I weighed in at 235. At home on my scale this morning, it showed 232. I’m not suggesting I’ve had a 3 pound weight loss. I’m just trying to record both, since they are different scales, and I will take both as a starting off point to see how I do with this new eating schedule.

One of the biggest problems I have in losing weight is figuring out my calorie intake for things I eat at home.

A month or so ago, I looked into more serious medical intervention like weight-loss surgery. I even considered signing up for an informational session. It was alarming to realize that my BMI is VERY close to the range where I would be considered a viable candidate for weight loss surgery. To qualify, you need a BMI over 40, and mine was 38 at the time I checked it. At a 38 bmi, you could qualify if you had other health problems, which I don’t. And I don’t want them either.

My ideal weight (high end) for my height (5′7″) is 160 pounds. In high school, I tended to weigh 150. As an adult, I was normally 170 or 180. It is only in the last four years (since my dad’s death) that I have really put on the weight.

One reason I gained so much in 2006: I was working two jobs AND going to grad school, which meant I tended to grab at least two fast food meals a day (lunch and dinner) as I drove to my various responsibilities.  I also think my weight gain tends to be related to stress.

On the news the other day, I saw a pretty cool idea. It’s the walkstation, which is a desk affixed to your treadmill.  I’d use it.